"ECONOMY" IS THE WATCHWORD
There's a part of me that has begun to really admire the sheer, bloody-minded level of consistency that the U.S Republican Party has shown in its choice of Vice President since 1988. Back in the dying days of The Cold War they gave us Dan Quayle - A man of extraordinary qualities I'm sure, provided that you were able to stop laughing at him long enough to actually find them. I'm still laughing. From 1988 until 1992 the leadership of the free world was a single assassin's bullet away from devolving to the sort of specimen that should have been expelled from the human race for failing the drug test. (He was tested and found to not be on any of them, thus the epic fail).
Fast forward to 2000 - mainly because I can't remember who the Republicans shoved into the arena after Bush (the Lesser) and Quayle (the bewildered) lost to Clinton and Gore, which marked the victory of Bush (the Least) and Cheney over Gore and somebodyorother. Once again, in fine tradition, the office of Vice President was occupied by someone who can only be described as ... "gifted", and was the perfect pairing for a former cocaine and booze hound of gargantuan proportions from Texas. It was amusing to watch, after a certain fun-filled hunting trip involving Mr Cheney, a firearm and a badly misplaced hunting companion, the members of the Secret Service keeping a paranoid eye on the VP, just in case he tried something against the President. (Who would you shoot, and how many times?)
There's a part of me that has begun to really admire the sheer, bloody-minded level of consistency that the U.S Republican Party has shown in its choice of Vice President since 1988. Back in the dying days of The Cold War they gave us Dan Quayle - A man of extraordinary qualities I'm sure, provided that you were able to stop laughing at him long enough to actually find them. I'm still laughing. From 1988 until 1992 the leadership of the free world was a single assassin's bullet away from devolving to the sort of specimen that should have been expelled from the human race for failing the drug test. (He was tested and found to not be on any of them, thus the epic fail).
Fast forward to 2000 - mainly because I can't remember who the Republicans shoved into the arena after Bush (the Lesser) and Quayle (the bewildered) lost to Clinton and Gore, which marked the victory of Bush (the Least) and Cheney over Gore and somebodyorother. Once again, in fine tradition, the office of Vice President was occupied by someone who can only be described as ... "gifted", and was the perfect pairing for a former cocaine and booze hound of gargantuan proportions from Texas. It was amusing to watch, after a certain fun-filled hunting trip involving Mr Cheney, a firearm and a badly misplaced hunting companion, the members of the Secret Service keeping a paranoid eye on the VP, just in case he tried something against the President. (Who would you shoot, and how many times?)
If you go to the woods today, you're in for a big surprise,Now we have Sarah Palin. The sort of politician that has comedians the world over coming in their collective socks in sheer, unbridled joy. I'll admit, I'm a fan - But only because I enjoy watching this sort of train wreck in action secure in the knowledge that I'm not there. It's like somehow the Republican Party managed to grab everything that's memorable about Quayle (dim, without the charm of Gomer Pyle to make it work for him), Dubya (ignorant as sin and as thick as a bag of frozen pig shit) and Cheney (bad news with firearms no matter what species you are) and rolled them into a one-size-fits all bag of genetic defects before giving it as a running mate to John McCain who, from latest accounts, probably needed a guide dog to help him fly his plane properly back in Vietnam.
As the Vice President shoots you between the eyes..
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